Corporate Language Explained

Hello my hopeless hermits!

Today we're going to translate some of the sophisticated terms you encounter in your day-to-day corporate life. Read between the lines!

1. MUST BE METICULOUS AND DETAILED- responsibility for your work lies with you, we can't afford quality inspections

2. GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS- tell the clients what they want to hear and listen to everything the boss has to say

3. TEAM PLAYER- your contribution is appreciated but you're not getting any of the credit

4. PRO-ACTIVE AND RESPONSIBLE- do what you have to do without being told, if anything bad happens it's your fault alone

5. COMPETITIVE SALARY- our offer is comparable to the lowest in the industry

6. CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE- we pay you to little to expect you to dress well

7. EXPERIENCED CANDIDATE PREFERRED- to make up for the combined experience of four people who just left

8. CAREER MINDED- no life, no family, just work

9. EXCELLENT REMUNERATION AND BONUS- we own your ass for life

10. MUST BE FLEXIBLE- bend down, grab your ankles and enjoy it