Suggested Alternative Careers for Conventional Boring Office People Part 1

Gossip boy

"Work life is like a box of chocolates, you know you are getting an expired box if it's too good to be true"...Gossip boy

If you happen to be a sad MOFO middle class kid who's stuck in the morning rush to Kay Ell every day in his middle class national car that bleeds petrol and screams REPAIR!, who lives in his four by four greying cubicle from 9 to 9 staring at the computer screen, put up with a dead end job that pays church mice better, contend with office asswipe goofballs who think his lame ass jokes are funny and that everyone ACTUALLY likes him and a boss who's god's gift to assholism, then...

You might happen to have thoughts of just slapping your collegues a few good times, stick a 'KICK ME' sign at the back of the office goofball with permanent glue and do the Stone Cold Steve Austin on your boss punya head a few good times...rest assured... i feel you

Then maybe its time to consider alternative careers which might not be too steep of a corporate ladder to climb, but nonetheless i am sure it's more fulfilling than what you currently are experiencing as of right now and morally and spiritually upLiFTING (sad self consoling effort of an underachiever)

Here are one or two alternative careers that might interest you

1) DIGI Yellow Man (the fatty)

Pros:

People are more receptive of you

You're always BRIGHT and in centre of attention

Kids love you...at least somebody does now

You get to stalk people without excuse and sing I will folo u...

International Assignments might be a possibility

Cons

Racist Employment... La La Chinese only

Feng Shui masters might want to kidnap you...remember the DIGI ad?

2) Mat Rempit






















Pros

You might be the next Valentino Rossi

Easy Bohsia girls and Easier bapuks... "easy like Sunday Morning" aka Lionel Ritchie

You might be the next big star in "KL Menjerit" or "Kampung Baru Rangers" or "Mami Jarum" or "Jangan Main Belakang"

You get a free trip to North Pole to skydive from your UMNO friends

No need to follow traffic rules... who does anyway?


Cons

Things might get a bit "hairy" when the cops are in town

You might lose your wallet

Have cops on your back

or even worse







Or even worse...lose your head...haha