Types Of People At Work Part 3

Buongiorno colleghi!

Enjoy the final installment of Types Of People At Work!

7. The Old Bag

The Old Bag of the office aka Old Lady aka Ancient Relic is the office stalwart who has been there since the beginning of time. She wears clothes your grandmama wouldn't be caught dead in and smells like a funeral parlor. For some reason she still comes to the office every day and no one knows what she really does.

There are two kinds of Old Bags basically, one the benign and benevolent one (seen knitting here) and the other is The Bitch at an advanced age. The Kind Old Bag is harmless except for the fact that she puts people to sleep with stories of her great-great-great grandchildren. The Mean Old Bag despises anyone younger than her and is out to get you. To defy her efforts, simply call the old folks' home and report a missing resident. Before they arrive, slip a sleeping pill into her tea. When she wakes up and realizes where she is, she might not even want to come back to work.


8. The Goofball

The Office Goofball is the life of the party. The fun in funny. The, oh well you get it. He can be your best friend when you are in need of some serious bro-time or to fool around. He is exemplary when it comes to any activities that do not involve any actual work, like office sports events, birthday parties, karaoke nights, etc. He will not let you down.

However the Goofball is not reliable when it comes to his job and if you are his friend, this could compromise your relationship. To make sure all work and no play doesn't make Jack dull, orchestrate silly competitions based around work. First person to make a 100 sales gets a free round of drinks after work! Highest number of orders processed in a day gets an extra round on the office Playstation (yes, some offices do have them).

9. The Boss

There are basically two types of Bosses (gender notwithstanding): adept and inept.

The adept Boss is seen as the ideal manager, capable of motivating subordinates to achieve long term organizational goals and fulfill their own self actualization. This Boss is the Utopian dream. If you have him or her, I suggest you stay put.

The inept boss just talks a lot and goes to lunch with clients and/or plays golf with them. Unfortunately most of us are stuck with this boss. There is not much you can do for they arrived at their position through contacts or plain dumb luck. To handle a Boss of this calibre, refer to "How To Look Busy At Work". These are surefire ways to fool your genius of a Boss. Also, you might want to learn their idiosyncracies and use them to win your boss's favor. You called, Boss? Coming!!

A presto!